Red Rumsfeld (murda murda)

Dallas audiences will be in for a treat this weekend! It seems that Small Appliance Puppet Theater super star Jeff Swearingen accidentally overheard this conversation between Secretary of State Donald Rumsfeld and Vice President Dick Cheney:

Rumsfeld: Nobody understands Don Rumsfeld. You know why, Dick? I’ll tell you. It’s because I never wanted to be the bureaucrat you see before you – my secret dream is to be a poet!

Cheney: Like – Emily Dickenson, right?

Rumsfeld: Do I look like some reclusive, sexually ambiguous New England chick? No! Deep inside, I’m an urban poet. Like Heavy D! And Snoop Dog! Don Rumsfeld is down with his homies.

What a revelation! Upon hearing this heartfelt confession, Jeff immediately contacted the Secretary of Defense and offered to collaborate on a new song for the upcoming performance of Puppet Government at the Dallas HUB Theater this weekend. The result was a brilliant Rumsfeld Rap aka "Red Rumsfeld (murda murda)" which will be performed live for the first time this Friday-Sunday.

Just to whet your appetite, here's a tasty little sample:

I believe what I said, I don't know what I said
But I know what I think, assume it's what I said.
Risen' from the bed I possess up in my head
The locations of weapons in Tikrit and BagDEAD
Time to kick Iraqian ass to simply put it best
Cuz the weapons are located to the south east and west
And to the north somewhat, who you callin' a jerk
It's not my business to do intelligent work

Now doesn't that make you want to buy a ticket? Like right now? You can, you know. Tickets can be reserved in advanced by calling 214-749-7010 or E-mail tickets@shane-arts.com.
Please include your
1.) Name
2.) Phone number (preferably mobile)
3.) Number of tickets (and any discounts)
4.) Date, Time and Show.

See you there?